
The white bowl waiting
Days dissolve, long and bland.
Days dissolve, long and bland.
Truth is not in the findings, but the fast. A hollow grace, and then the waiting ends.
- Forest Bed
- Them Guts
- On The Blog
- Start Select Reset 📑
- Photo 365
- The Ministry Of My Own Labour
- Terminal Access
- Dipping the Stacks
- Reading
- Music
- Remember Kids:
Forest Bed Double Set – Surbiton – Thursday 20th Nov
My band is playing a double set at The Lamb in Surbiton on Thursday I think we’re playing about 90mins of material. If you are in London and at a loose end on Thursday night why not head down to Surbiton and see us play?

Honestly London people, I know zone 6 sounds far away, but you you can be at The Lamb, in the warm, and have a pint in your hand, inside of 20mins if you get the fast train from Waterloo! Come down!
Them Guts Again
Ugh! Seriously, how is it already this late on a Tuesday evening? I swear, time is moving at warp speed right now. So last week was an absolute WEEK, and this one is shaping up to be similar but for very different reasons.
I had a colonoscopy on Tuesday last week. Thats probably all you really need to know. lol.

Anyways, this most recent procedure marked my fourth since I was first diagnosed with Crohn’s disease way back when I was 17. So it meant yet another deeply glamorous visit to the Endoscopy ward at my local hospital. Last time I went for the other end, the Endoscopist joked about my needing a stamp card I’ve been so many times. lol.
If you’ve never had a colonoscopy, let me tell you it’s a whole thing. You can’t just rock up and get it done. A few days beforehand you have to stop eating fibre, which sounds easy until you realise that means basically you don’t get to eat anything nice and or tasty for 4 days. I tried to get excited about the novelty of eating white bread again, but then I actually had some and remembered immediately why I never buy it. It’s just sweet, salty, disappointment and air.
Then there’s the day before, everyone tells you “the prep is the worst part” and they are not wrong. Taking the laxatives is just a miserable experience thats a full day of nothing but self pity.
Anyways, the operation itself was fine. Being a pro at it at this point, I always firm it and just opt for gas and air only, with no sedation, so I can just leave as soon as they’re done with me and go home to my own bed. The staff are always lovely, very calm and kind, and they talk you through what they’re doing. It’s still not what I’d call fun, but compared to the prep it’s honestly not that bad.
The not fun bit, for me, comes afterwards. I’ve got a few complications left over from an operation I had in my early twenties, which means recovery is a much slower and more painful process than it is for most people. So whilst the hospital bit was in-and-out, the days after were not. I basically shuffled around the flat like John Wayne, feeling quite sorry for myself for a few days.
The good news to this sob story however, is that I got this result:

It’s quite wild really. It’s taken 23 years from being in the ICU and getting diagnosed, to being in full remission. And quite possibly (fingers crossed) a very strong chance I might come off my medication next year. Which is going to be really weird.
By the time I started to feel even vaguely human again it was the weekend. I technically had deadlines. There were things I could have done; probably things I should have done. Instead I did absolutely none of them and played video games. Zero regrets.
Sunday was fully booked though, as I had an all day band / 6 hour practice in prep for the show on Thursday and the best thing about it was that I took my slippers with me to the studio. What a life hack to only just discover in your 40s!

Yesterday I swung in the opposite direction and spent the whole day in deep research mode. Then today I booked tickets to head back to Berlin again for 3 nights before the month ends. I’m free Friday lunch time (28th) if anyone is about/wants to meet up.
I’m just writing this now late having got back from another 3 hour band practice. Come to our gig!
On The Blog
Nothing posted her since last week! In the meantime why not head over to my other blog Byenne? and catch up on the last week of posts?
Some stories live on the surface.
Others live underneath.
Those are the ones
you trip over
years later.
Start Select Reset 📑
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Photo 365

The Ministry Of My Own Labour
- FINISHED EPISODE 302 TEXT 😮💨
- Two long calls in a project adversary capacity
- Thats it
Terminal Access
No written recommendation this week. Instead I highly recommend this 2h long documentary that got dropped on youtube with little fanfare about two brothers going on a year long birdwatching road trip. I won’t say any more than that other than its a very easy 2 hours. Fantastically produced. Brilliant indie film making.
Dipping the Stacks
You might conclude young people just don’t care about music anymore.
However, one unexpected source of music discovery is quietly booming among Gen Z listeners: college radio.
First known recording of computer music, 1951
The Copeland-Long restoration of the earliest known recording of computer music, recorded at Alan Turing’s Computing Machine Laboratory in Manchester in 1951.
Prediction: the Successor to Postmodernism
I see no better explanation for the rise of speculation, gambling, and public prediction in the last ten years of popular culture than as a mass revolt against the numbing apathy of late postmodernism.
Even more interestingly, what does it mean when predictions become positive sum with that level of granularity? Do more people start working together to make something a reality? Or stop something from happening? Who knows.
Remedies for Ridiculous House Prices
I can think of three policies—at least two of which are politically feasible, but only if they’re done together. These are “Property Income Limited Leverage” (“The PILL”), an “Affordable Housing Authority” (“AHA”), and a “Modern Debt Jubilee” (“MDJ”).
The PILL and AHA have to be implemented together, because they attack two ends of the predicament we are now in, and they balance each other in terms of their effects on house prices. The PILL would reduce house prices, while the AHA would increase them, and simultaneously enable low income earners to buy a house.
Description
Reading
I finished Being Aware of Being Aware by Rupert Spira. A delightful collection of short essays. Very well handled, reads much like his retreat Q&A’s
I’m still reading Antimemetics: Why Some Ideas Resist Spreading by Nadia Asparouhova but I also started reading Marguerite Porete: The Mirror of Simple Souls by Marguerite Porete on Alan Chapman‘s recommendation its a monster. Huge book.
Music
Tophouse – The Mountain Song
I’ve been listening to loads of the Americana / Folk band Tophouse this week. Not because they have anything new out, but because I really like them. My band wrote a new song recently and it reminds me of a Tophouse track, so i’ve been listening to their catalogue to try and figure out what I can do with the base line to bring a little more too it.
One of their recent hits is The Mountain Song, here they are performing it at the Grand Ole Opry a couple of years ago.
Remember Kids:
Pavlov’s dogs had learned to associate the ringing of a bell with the imminent arrival of dinner to the point where the sound of the bell alone made the dogs salivate in anticipation of dinner. Would my little peas learn that the position of a small fan—the equivalent to the ringing bell—rightly predicted the time and place for the occurrence of the only light made available to them—their dinner?
Thus Spoke the Plant by Monica Gagliano
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