# Yesterday felt like a bit of a wasted day, like it wasn't going anywhere. I was perfectly content with not posting anything but, as the day went on, I felt like I should be doing something with it but couldn't bring myself it read a book or write.

Patrick Rhone wrote that we should embrace the current uncertainty rather than fight it in order to deal better with these times of lockdown and isolation. This lead me down the path of comparing aspects of Zen and Stoicism, especially the notion of not worrying about things you can't control. I did a little digging but couldn't bring myself to go any further and do anything with it.

Yesterday also marked two years since the introduction of the "On this day" feature but I couldn't even find the enthusiasm to mark that anniversary.

I imagine that part of it was anxiety over knowing I would be "back at work" again today and on a late shift which, without the commute, ironically seems worse when working from home. I find I'm increasingly struggling with the current setup the longer it goes on.

I'm also having the same ups and downs as everyone else with regards to the problems with lockdown: some good days, some bad ones. That we have been in full isolation, not able to leave the house for the past two weeks, has compounded the issue. I think yesterday was just a bad day.

Things improved later on when we sat down as a family to watch the Elton John musical/biopic Rocketman - it was an ideal distraction. I had heard some bad things about the non-musical sections of the film but found it to be a very entertaining watch. That Taron Egerton actually did all the singing and didn't just lipsync to Elton's tracks made it so much better. There were some incredibly surreal scenes that served to emphasise just how bad Elton's drug problem had been, real "how did I get here?" moments, while giving a very fluid transition between events and times.

Despite everything, I managed to maintain both my daily writing practices and meditation routine so am happy about that.

Colin Walker Colin Walker colin@colinwalker.blog